Greenpoint, October, 2015

Friday, August 10, 2012

Saving Big Blue

Feeling lucky?
According to today's Times, the U.S. Postal Service has reported a $5.2 Billion loss in just the last quarter. That's a lot of stamps. There are plenty of reasons for this, of course--private carriers, email, probably not bicycle messengers--but the big one is the 2006 coup de tĂȘte passed by the Republican Congress to require the USPS, and solely the USPS, to prefund future retirees' health benefits. Result: Default.

The BTB Research Bureau has been working overtime on this problem, and we believe we have come up with a solution that capitalizes on a core USPS asset: ubiquity. Let's turn sidewalk mailboxes into mobile lottery ticket dispensers with the proceeds reverting to the Post Office to pay off its debts (and keep those cards and letters coming). Not only will this save the Service, it will ease traffic in the bodegas for the newspaper, beer and Twinkie-buying public. Win-win.


  1. You sure got alotta new you own a sports coat?

  2. Yes! But as Postmaster General I will be wearing my uniform.